Sometimes something as simple as a little button with a slogan of a few words can make a difference in a life. I wear them often in social situations. They can start conversations. Sometimes they can start people thinking. It often seems we do far too little of that. We seem to get caught up in the rat race of life and forget why we work for success. One of my favorite little buttons says, “IF YOU'RE GOING TO WALK ON THIN ICE, YOU MIGHT AS WELL DANCE.”

Life is certainly much like thin ice. We have no guarantees. Today could be the last day for any of us. This life is a pretty shaky situation, at best. I believe that to make our lives meaningful it is vital that we enjoy today. Each and every day we face unknowns. There are potential dangers. Many of the dangers we face daily certainly are real, even if they are not very likely to happen to us; it is still possible that they could.

In my practice, I specialize in anxiety disorders. People who are caught up in the dynamic of panic attacks or other anxiety disorders often get what I call the “what ifs.” They begin to fear that their anxiety will overcome them in some public place or in a place where they will be out of control or helpless. Of course, the fear that the attack will happen is almost as bad as the attack, and frequently actually brings on an attack. I think that many of us who do not have any anxiety disorder may be spending too much time living with the “what ifs.” 

I might not get to finish this article. I could have a heart attack in the next minute. The Great California Earthquake could happen in the next moment. A jet flying overhead could crash into my office. A stray bullet from a drive-by shooting could hit me in the head. None of these things is likely. They are all possible. The point I wish to make is that I wouldn't waste a single minute worrying about any of those things. What a waste of time! If one of those unlikely things were to happen and I spent my last hour of life worrying about it, what would I have gained? NOTHING! 
I would have wasted an hour of precious, wonderful life. Life is far too short to spend any time on the “what ifs” of life.

So much energy and precious time is wasted on things that are very unlikely to happen. I wouldn't suggest that we go through life with rose-colored glasses, living in a fantasy. But neither would I suggest that we focus on the negatives in life that are beyond our control. Living this life is certainly like walking on thin ice. Dance while you are here. I think it is our obligation to find and create as much joy in our time here as we can.

I know many of us have old negative habits. Some of these habits are simply thought patterns. You are not a slave to your past. Your thoughts do not control you, or at least they should not do so. You are the boss. This is your life and you can make changes. You are responsible for your thoughts, your feelings, and your behaviors. It is easy to get caught up in old negative habits; whether they be habits of thought or behavior, you CAN change them. First you must know what you wish to change. What about your daily life, or possibly your perception of yourself, would you like to be different? Now, how do you want it to be different? Answer these questions and you are already on your way.

In my last article here I wrote, “If you don't make changes in your life, your life will not change.” Do you feel you are in a rut in business or in your personal life? You made that rut. You can change it. 

I don't think everyone necessarily needs therapy, of whatever variety. I do think that often the real value of therapy is increased awareness of ourselves, the place we have found in life, and our ability to make changes. It is easy to become so involved with the daily affairs of life that we forget that this particular moment or place is not life, just a small part of it. If it is not what we wish it to be, we can change it. No therapist is going to fix or change your life. A good therapist can help you see your situation more clearly and perhaps help you find the life road that you desire. Therapy does not change you. Only you can do that. Therapy is just a new window through which you can look to get a better perspective of the place you wish to go in life.

Of course, as a hypnotherapist, I am a bit biased. I feel the mental tools available through hypnotherapy provide an excellent way to make changes in our lives. I do not think hypnosis is the answer to everyone's problems. I don't think any form of therapy can make that claim. Ultimately you are responsible for your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. The insights gained from therapy and the mental techniques you learn to use effectively are simply tools you can use to make this amazing journey of life more effective and more enjoyable along the way. You are the driver on this journey. A good therapist just cleans the windows so you can drive more effectively. You still do all of the driving.